HOSPITAL AGAIN

I wasn't worried about my hospital appointment today. I thought I would be in and out but it wasn't like that. I saw the vampire again for blood tests.

I have to have a bronchoscopy on 4th August.

I also discovered that I have a gynae appointment on the 14th August. I have been waiting for this appointment since the 27th February.

So a glut of hospital appointments all at once. TYPICAL me.

Never mind I know there are others far worse off than me and I will cope and get through everything thrown at me. I just have to break it down into little sections and try not to worry too much.

My biggest worry was last week so the rest should be easy.

Best wishes to everyone

Fee

HIDING

I want to hide and run away from everything that is happening to me.

Hospital appointments are looming one is tomorrow the other the following Wednesday.

I want to bury myself in my blankets and go to sleep forever. I know life is for living but right now it doesn't feel like it.

I wish my life could be easy. Life is tough I know that more than most. I just wish I could overcome my fear of walking through those hospital doors and sit in the waiting room of the clinic. That is the worst for me the waiting. I hope it is not too long this time.

Many times before I have been sat in the waiting room and nearly bolted out of it. It is fear but what on earth am I afraid of?

My head is in my hands and I keep shaking. The more times I go to hospital the worse it is. Ignorance is bliss, well it is in my eyes and under these circumanstances.

Once tomorrow's appointment is over so will the fear be.

Then the day before the next one the fear will start again.

I wish I could control my feelings but then that would make me boring I suppose. It shows I am human and have feelings too.

Best wishes to everyone.

Fee