Update

Well it seems things are conspiring against me. My cough has reappeared so hence I did not go swimming last night.

Steve as ever is supportive. Each time I cough or let him know I am in pain he suggests Hospital. This is a pain as I know we can't afford the car parking.

I just wish there was a solution to our problems but there does not appear to be one at the moment.

All I can do is keep hoping that I can stay positive to keep going.

Steve suggested opening a bottle of wine last night but to me that would be causing a downward spiral so we refrained from that.

My thoughts are all over the place at the moment and I can't understand how I feel dark clouds are looming but I try and dispel them. I am determined not to take anti-depressants or rely on other medication to help me through the day.

I take the bare minimum of pain killers as they aggravate my other health conditions.

That was why I was so hoping to go swimming last night.

Will see what today brings and who knows I may feel a bit better I am glad I can write as this helps me concentrate on how I really feel.